Friday, June 23, 2006

Bark: That must be a world record...

I've just been reading a piece on the BBC News website about how one of the oldest tortoises in the world has just died at the grand old age of 175, and I was somewhat bemused when I read this quote from one of the vets.

"She had a very fairly acute heart attack..."

Contradicting yourself in the space of two words. Impressive. Surely it's either "a very acute heart attack" or "a fairly acute heart attack" not "very fairly". In fact, if you're having a heart attack, I fail to see how it can be anything less than "very acute", from your point of view. "Oh, it's just fairly mild one. I'll be fine in ten minutes..."

I'm guessing that dear Dr Hangar has been watching too much football over the course of the World Cup. That's the kind of verbal mangling I'd normally only associate with footballers.

With examples like this, it's little wonder that my girlfriend spends more time in her lessons teaching Surrey's children more about English grammar than French...
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